morning bible study

on weekday mornings pastor rudy and i take the kids to school and go to starbucks and get into the word of GOD.
today we read Acts 3-6 over an americano w/ room & splenda (lori) and a white chocolate mocha with whipped cream (rudy).
ready?

6Then Peter said, "Silver or gold I do not have, but what I have I give you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk."
NIV
Acts 3:6

You see, I get bothered by the fact that beyond potatoes I think I don't have a lot to offer the mommies in particular of papago ct, or roseland, or apple valley or west ninth... or kenton court for that matter... And really it has become a trick of the enemy. It's so not about the potatoes but I start seeing so much need beyond hunger.. for the save and unsaved families... On any given day I receive a phone call or text from people asking me, Lori, "I don't have rent... I don't have food... my kids are hungry... I have no tomatoes..." And then I just feel terrible because I don't have anything to give them...
At least, that's the trick.
Notice how many times I said "I."
This ministry isn't about being "benevolent" as a brother once told me we were...
He told me that we were a "benevolent ministry" rather than a "church."
I remember thinking, oh, okay, and I think I even blogged about it...
But that was a trick.
That's not what RAVEN is.
I also remember a sister telling me once when we first started a couple years back that the reason we were seeing so many come to the LORD was because "of course they come to you, you give them things...."
Well, that was all tricks of the enemy too.
You see, we have been out ministering w/o food before.
It makes it harder, I won't lie... on us as a team... to get the people there...if you look at it that way...
Or it makes it easier too...
We can get so caught up in the thousands of pounds of food that all we become is what the brother said, "a benevolent ministry" and what the sister said, "people who give people free stuff."
And that, is NOT what RAVEN stands for...
Restoring
A
Vision
Evangelizing
Nations

We're out there to be obedient.
To feed the hungry on Thursday nights.
Absolutely.
that's part of it.
But I can no longer get frustrated when I don't have enough $ to go buy hundreds of dollars of baby clothes or hundreds of pairs of socks... because what we are supposed to be offering is what the scripture says:
Silver or gold I do not have, but what I have to give to you" is JESUS.
Now, the enemy may try and trick me again...
Into thinking that I fail when I can't pay someone's rent...
or I can't give them a home...
or save their marriage...
but that's when it's most important for me to remember to GIVE what I can until it hurts~
that JESUS wants my mercy not my sacrifice
and to keep my focus on leading others to walk with the LORD~
rather than try and keep them comfortable all the way to hell...
because I fail them...
but HE won't...
and as I asked Rich today about how tough that is for me to get out there and not get caught up in the "trying to fill every need for these mommas"...
I'll continue to go and trust the LORD...
but it hurts to see so many in need, get so many phone calls & texts...
it just plain hurts.